Emmett Colton

Life is busy and I am missing so many small updates.  I wanted to post about Sierra’s accident and then about Emmett.  Big stories in our lives this year!!  Emmett couldn’t really be a quick post so I was trying to find time when I could sit down and focus.  I got three hour of sleep last night so obviously this is the perfect time. Ha ha ha. 

The night of Sierra’s accident they had decided to induce Kassi. That was the 22nd.  He wasn’t born until early in the morning on the 24th.   He took his sweet time coming!  Poor Kass was in labor for 30-ish hours!!  Later we decided that Emmett had to straddle the veil between heaven and earth a bit longer so he could help his Auntie Sierra through her accident.  💙 

I tried to stay up through the night of the 23rd/24th waiting for news but I was exhausted.  I kept my phone turned on and still slept through the ringing when HD called around 4am to say they had decided to do a c-section.  Poor Kass was having a hard time.  I woke up pretty quickly after he left a message and prayed for them all.  Emmett was born just before 4:30am.  He weight 7’11 and was 20 inches long (I think) I need to go back and look!  They sent pictures as soon as they could.  Trina, Kass’s mom, was with them the whole time.  She is an angel!!  We FaceTimed them later that day.  Oh how excited we were to have this little one join our family!!  We all tried again and again to figure out his hair color.  Would he be a ginger like his momma? It looked that way at first but then the kids said blonde.  I of course thought they just weren’t holding him in the right light.  Well I am here to tell you we still don’t know what color that kids hair is!  Lol.  Some days it looks reddish, mostly it looks brownish blonde.  I think he will end up blonde with a hint of strawberry. ❤️ Emmett is now five months old and the light of our lives.  He is the happiest, smiliest most giggly baby ever!!  We FaceTimed him once a week or so in the beginning. Now we do it every coupe of days.  He is so interactive and laughs when we play peek a boo together.  I think he really knows us!  He probably wonders why Mimi lives in the phone but all is well.  He sleeps like a champ and has been such a good baby.  HD and Kass are great parents.  That kid is so lucky!!  They adore him and each other.  It’s a pretty sweet life.  

Haylee and I saw him in May at three days old, hung out for a few days then drove to Cali.  Saw him a couple more days when we drove back.  Then we all went out in August for his blessing. HD gave him a beautiful blessing and Sierra flew in from Cali so we were all together.  It was an amazing week.  It was so good to see Sierra walking!  Unassisted!!  She still has a slight limp and is scarred but she handles her roadblocks like a warrior.  

Here are pics from the first five months of Emmett’s life.  

Just kidding I have done this post five times and it keeps messing up!  We will do a couple of recent pictures and then update from there!! 

He is a darling happy boy!!! 

The accident part 2

I got to Sierra about 8 days after her accident (I stopped in Utah to see baby Emmett - more to come on that amazing little one in the next post) 

I didn’t rush to her because she wasn’t alone, she was in the hospital (where they took mediocre care of her) and she has my dad and Joey.  So let’s talk about that real quick. About 6 days after the accident Joey said he needed to think about some things and that hospitals were “hard for him”.   Seriously.  When I got there day 8/9 he hadn’t come to see her and wasn’t checking in.  Day 13 he broke up with her completely.  I went to get lunch and came back to a hysterical Sierra.  She was sobbing, hyperventilating and just losing it.  I did my best to calm her but nothing was working.  She wanted to get out of bed and run. Not easy to do with a recently repaired femur and ankle (her ankle needed two plates and a bunch of screws to stabilize the break)  we got her out of bed and walking the hall a little bit she was dying to go outside.  She needed fresh air and to see the sun. We had asked for days if she could go outside but they gave her the runaround.  That day I found a nurse (it was actually student nurse George cause he was the first person I saw) and told him “George, find her nurse.  We ARE going outside. Get us a wheelchair.”  After a quick explanation they did and we went out and Sierra felt the sun for the first time in two weeks.  Obviously Joey was a super jerk and Sierra is WAY better off without him.  The pain he caused her was almost worse than the accident. Hate that guy. 

Ok now back to when we got there.  I spent every day cheering, advocating and trying to keep Sierra comfortable.  They had not let her have a shower -and never did in that hospital. It was awful. I got her in the bathroom and washed her hair and helped her clean up all over. When I was helping to take off her underclothes I saw her bum and back for the first time. She had a HUGE bruise running up her right butt cheek. How the heck did that happen? Obviously Sierra didn’t know it was there since she couldn’t see it. I commented “How on earth did you get a bruise here?” She replied “must have been where the angles were bracing me.” I really think that had to be it.  Oh that poor girl.  She was so beat up.  Day 14 she had surgery on her orbital bone. That was the exact surgery Joe had on his eye when he got hit with the softball.  The doc was impressed with my orbital bone surgery knowledge lol. Every surgery set her back in pain so much.  It was horrible. She was doing ok then they operated on her eye and she was back to square one. Out of control pain, just miserable. They afternoon they told her she was being discharged.  What. The. Heck?!? Her pain was a nine she hadn’t eaten or moved but they wanted me to load her up in the car and take her home. The whole time the plan was to get her to a rehab hospital.  She was in no condition to go back home.  She hadn’t even showered!!  I was on the phone with her case worker, the rehab place and her nurses.  We finally made a plan to get her to the rehab hospital. We had to transport via ambulance. Keep in mind two seconds before that they were going to throw her in the car with me. Anywho, the ambulance came around 8:30pm. The nurse gives me a bunch of paper work and tells me I need to go to the pharmacy to get Sierra’s meds.  WHAT? It’s almost 9 at night and now I have to find a rite aid to get meds? Awesome. I ran to rite aid, talked to the pharmacist like a crazy person because I am not Sierra but need her meds.  The pharmacist says to give them a minute. After 10-ish minutes they call me up and tell me that the rehab hospital has their own pharmacy and in fact four of these five prescriptions have been sent over there electronically.  I cried then I was FUMING.  I ran out of there and down to the rehab hospital. The place is locked up but the ambulance that took Sierra is there they give me her room number and about that time some nice lady is walking out the front door and she holds it open for me.  I had to look completely crazy. Crying, carrying three vases of flowers, goodness. I went in the place looks deserted. No big signs so I am wandering hallways looking for a room number.  I finally find her, I am so relieved and she tells me they have her almost zero pain meds. The rehab place had to follow the hospital orders until  the rehab docs saw her the next morning. She had had surgery THAT DAY. Her pain was a 9!!  I lost it.  I was just bawling s. Poor Sierra.  She was telling me she was ok and trying to comfort me.  Oh what a night. It was just terrible. I stayed with her for a while and had to get home to get some sleep.  I went to Tys  and cried myself to sleep. The next morning I get a text from Sierra that says the rehab docs almost choked on their coffee when they realized how little pain meds she had been given considering she has EDS and was a trauma patient!!  They adjusted her meds quickly and got her a shower.  A real actual shower!!  What a blessing Casa Colina would turn out to be.  Sierra spent two weeks there and they were amazing. We met some wonderful people and they just took such good care of Sierra.  I had to leave her about day 19 and it was crazy hard.  The only thing giving me the strength to walk out the door was knowing that the nurses and docs at CC would take such good care of her.  

The months since her accident have been rough.  Sierra is amazing.  Not that we didn’t know it before but this has brought it to a whole new level.  She has strength that goes deeper than anything I can describe. She is full of grace and keeps a smile on her darkest days.  Our testimonies have all grown because of her.  

She went back to work about 8 weeks after the accident. She was driving about 12 weeks later.  She has just been a shining example to us all.  I will post more pics soon.  Just wanted to get the words out. :) 

My next post will be all about our baby Emmett.  He is a joy in our lives.  💙

The Accident

I have needed to blog this for awhile.  I knew it would take some time but it must be documented.  On May 22nd I had a normal day.  Went to a retirement celebration and had fun visiting with friends.  We had found out a couple of days before that Joe got a new position at work and it was a big step up for him. It would mean two more years at Minot and we were excited and proud. HD and Kassi were on their way to the hospital to be induced.  The doc thought Emmett was big and since Kass isn’t they decided to induce her.  The evening was full of energy and happiness. At around 9:30 my phone rang it was Sierra’s boyfriend Joey.  I figured Sierra was in the hospital. I assumed her pain was overwhelming or she was having kidney stone issues again.  Joey was calm and said “Sierra is in the hospital” (duh I already knew that) then he said “she was in an accident.  She is hurt but she is stable.” The words she was stable seemed comforting and scary why would a doc describe someone as stable? Was she unstable before? Joey told me her femur was broken and that she had “some swelling” around her left eye.  She was conscious and hurting.  He had called my dad (they were on their way to her) and said he would keep me updated.  I told Joe what had happened and called HD and Kass.  I told them to focus on the baby and to be happy to  keep me posted and I would do the same.  After that I called my mom, texted my brother and sister and a few friends and waited.  Joe went to bed telling me to wake him up if I needed him.  I called my dad.  He said he would call when he got to Sierra.  One friend I texted asked me what I needed and offered to come over to give me a hug.  I let her.  I was having a really hard time.  Why would Heavenly Father let this happen to Sierra? Her poor body goes through so much.  She is in pain every day and now her leg had to be broken??  I was sad and frustrated. Keva came and we talked through some of that.  Then my dad called.  He said Sierra was pretty beat up but doing ok.  I asked if she was going home (I had no idea) and he said “no way. She isn’t going anywhere for awhile.”  I was asking him a bunch of questions and then he told me Sierra was right there and that she was awake.  He put her on the phone and I lost it.  She said “I’m ok momma.  Its ok I’m ok.” Sweet girl was trying her best to comfort me.  We talked for a few and she handed the phone off.  I told dad to keep me posted.  Keva got ready to leave and I asked Joey to text me pictures of her.  Right as Keva was walking to the door I got the first pics of Sierra.  When I saw them I gasped and started to cry.  Her beautiful face was covered in blood.  Her eye was completely swollen shut and cut.  She was badly bruised.  Had I seen the first picture of her face and not known she was alive I would have assumed she did not survive the accident. It was the craziest rolllercoaster if emotions.  I was so sad and scared and happy that she had survived and that we were getting a baby! Craziest!!  Here are the pictures of Sierra that first night: 

Her poor face

Her left ankle was in bad shape too.  Badly, badly sprained.  Almost three months later it is still swollen. 


Cleaned up.  Her face and head were full of glass. 

Her hands were both cut up. 


Sierra doesn’t remember what happened.  She was not on her phone.  She hit two cars.  We don’t know if her old car malfunctioned or if she was looking at the next intersection. We may never know.  We still haven’t seen pictures of her car.  Joey and her dad went to the impound and got her stuff out of it.  They both said the could not believe she survived.  The engine was pushed all the way back to the firewall.  The front seat pushed to the back.  Sierra was unconscious and when she came to she said she was screaming for me and that the UPS driver was outside of her window telling her the paramedics were on their way then she passed out again. When she came to the paramedics were there and had to cut her out of the car with the jaws of life. She would later find out that when the paramedics came upon her accident they thought she was dead. She was taken to Pomona Valley Hospital via ambulance. The EMTs had to cut off her clothes and could not get an IV while they were driving which meant no pain medication for her. She was in the hospital alone for an hour or two before they got a hold of anyone. She was telling the EMTs to call her grandpa and they said we don’t do that. When she got to the hospital she repeated that phrase over and over until the nurse got her phone and got my dad’s phone number. My dad didn’t answer the call because he didn’t recognize the number and the message they left so that it was Pomona Valley Hospital social services calling. They said nothing about Sierra. Sierra said she laid there in the ER scared and praying being thankful that she was alive and asking heavenly father to take some of the pain away.  I can’t imagine how scared she was.  Sierra said she remembers getting into her car after work and having the thought who would I call if I were in an accident? It’s just the craziest thing to me that the spirit was whispering that to her before the accident happened.  

Sierra would spend the next four weeks in some type of hospital two full weeks in a full lawn hospital. Her femur was broken into places with the middle piece pushed out to the side and splintered. Her orbital bone was fractured deeply underneath her eye. She also had a broken ankle that she wouldn’t find out about until five days later. The swelling was so bad they had a hard time seeing through the x-rays Sierra would spend the next four weeks in some type of hospital two full weeks and a full lawn hospital. Her femur was broken into places with the middle piece pushed out to the side and splintered. Her orbital bone was fractured deeply underneath her eye. She also had a broken ankle that she wouldn’t find out about until five days later. The swelling was so bad they had a hard time seeing it in the xrays.  She would also require a blood transfusion two units of blood because when you break your femur you tend to lose a lot and her body was having a hard time replenishing it. Her accident happened on a Wednesday night. My dad stayed with her into the wee hours of the morning. When they moved her from the ER upstairs to her room and they had to move her from one bed to another my dad said her screaming was so bad and loud that nurses came running, he had never, ever in his life heard somebody scream like that her pain was unbearable.  Dad almost had a breakdown listening to her.  It was a long night. She had surgery on her femur Thursday early afternoon.  They insterted a rod from her hip to her knee.  It was rough.  Her pain was so bad. She did not get out of bed for 4-5 days.  It was awful not to be with her.  I am going to stop here for this post but will continue it soon.  It is good to remember all that she has been through. 

Complex

This post isn’t a catch up one. I still have three more to do -the next one coming is going to be a whopper and I am drained just thinking of writing it -I will though it’s important. 

I have been thinking a lot about personalities and relationships. I heard of a good book about that very topic. I need to get it and read it. 

My personality is very outgoing. Neither of my daughters are that way and it has been hard to relate to them sometimes. Haylee is a complete introvert.  She is very smart and often feels awkward in social situations.  That causes her some social anxiety and makes everything worse.  She has a few good friends but not a best friend and none that she sees more than once a week if she isn’t in school.  She prefers to be in her room alone at home.  She is kind, obedient, a little fiesty but that is usually manifests itself because of her anxiety.   She can’t handle being around a lot of people for a long period of time.  She needs her space.  Total opposite of me.  She feels everything very deeply.  She tries to take care of everyone but never lets her own needs be known.  I am a teller of all feelings, thoughts, ideas etc.... 

 Sierra likes her alone time too.  She is more outgoing than Haylee but still an introvert. Having EDS has changed her. Some good, some bad.  She is equal parts more and less empathetic.  She can’t stand dramatic people.  She feels empathy for those who feel pain but not if they seem to be exaggerating.  She is confident.  I am confident in who I am overall.  Sierra is stronger than any of us.  

HD is like me in most ways.  He is outgoing, never meets a stranger and doesn’t get too phased by others and their actions.  He is confident and has a positive outlook on life. It is easy for me to relate to him because we are so alike. 

It is interesting how our personalities have shaped our relationships with each other.  Despite our differences I am very close to each of the kids individually.  I am so thankful Heavenly Father gave them to me!! 

Time to catch up -graduation

It has been awhile and so very much has happened.  I am going to go in chronological order. Hopefully, I can get the best details in the post but still be brief since there is so much to catch up on.   

First up after my last post is our trip to Utah/Idaho. We headed down for HD and Kassi‘s graduation from BYU. We had a great time seeing the family and spending a few days at the cabin in Island Park. Poor Cass was just a month away from delivering Emmett but was a trooper through out to the graduation festivities. We also got to see my sister and meet my newest nephew Fisher.  I am always proud of my kids but one of my proudest moments was seeing HD walk across that stage and get his Bachelors degree. Considering I was only 18 when he was born he had a lot of statistics against him. Seeing him walk at his college graduation give me such a feeling of joy and accomplishment. I was so proud of him, of US!  We did it.  Of course I am proud of Kathy too she was a trooper being pregnant most of this school year.

The snow pile at church in Island Park

Haylee showing grandma and grandpa her drawing tablet 

Me and mom on the razor 

HD sent me this pic a few days before we got there.  

This one was sent with the text “the whole family” it made me cry!!  

Emmett and Mimi, the first time HD and Kass realized that they had moved down my favorite people list. 

Sure love these two dads.  

Graduates!!  

Us -Haylee wasn’t with us this first day, this was just commencement.  Day two was convocation. 



We got to see the Heath’s!!  Our favorite Missouri friends!  So very glad to see them. 

 Cutest girls! 

Deano LOVES his uncle Joe.  When he sees him he jumps up and down and says “Joe! Joe! Joe!”  It’s the cutest.  Joe went to the bathroom before this photo and Dean cried when he left lol. 

The kids crossing the stage. Thank goodness for Kass’s red hair.  We can see those kiddos anywhere!  



So wish Sierra was here for this picture!  It’s one of my favorites!! 

This kiddo is adorable!! 

Kass was having some good contractions this day but Emmett would stay put for another month! ❤️

We also had Kassi’s baby shower that weekend.  They were so sweet to wait for me to be there.  Her mom and aunts did an amazing shower for her.  



Poor Haylee for sick right before the shower.  She threw up on the way there and a few times more throughout the day.  She was a trooper as we traveled back to Idaho as soon as the shower was over. 

The drive home was uneventful and Haylee didn’t barf anymore which was a win :) 

Better

I am much better than my last post.  I ended up writing a letter to my dad that I will probably never send but it was very therapeutic to say all the things I was feeling and thinking.  The things I wanted him to know but feel like it would only hurt him to tell him.  

Anywho, we won’t dwell on that.  Last weekend was conference and prom and the International Ball.  The best part? Conference for sure!  :)  We all watched each session together with the exception of a couple of the first talks Saturday that Joe missed.  Haylee and I love taking notes and eating snacks.  There were so many good talks and no breaking news lol.  Soooo many rumors before conference and none of them came to fruition.  It’s fun to speculate on new revelation but also good to remember that the Lord is in charge of the timing and order of all things.  :) 

Saturday night was prom.  Haylee went by herself and met friends there.  That caused me a ton of anxiety. I was so worried about her walking in alone.  She was nervous but brave.  We got her hair done for the occasion.  It was fairy princess hair for sure!! 

Joe and I attended the International Ball that evening too so we were all dressed up together.  ❤️

We were in a hurry so the pictures were pretty rushed.  This dress fit Haylee perfectly.  She loved it. I love this girl. 

They did not want to take this picture.  I made them and I’m glad.  

Us


Keva and I getting diet cokes at the bar :) 

Me and Steph. 

My date. 

A fun group. 

The ball was great. Both anthems were sung and the Canadian artillery pipe band played the bag pipes.  It was amazing. 

My girl after she got home.  She had fun.  Not the best time ever but a good night. 


Some of my favorite conference quotes. 





Our official pic.  :) 

My friend and neighbor Amber is moving.  We went to a girls dinner to wish her well.  We wore pink since Amber battled and beat breast cancer last year. 

I also went to a big craft fair with a bunch of these gals.  I got that gather sign for my dining room.  :) 

Emotional

Tired.  Emotional.  And just sad. 

This is me tonight.  I have been feeling a bit melancholy this week.  Missing my family.  Thinking about things I will miss with our new little one. And yet knowing that he will never doubt for one minute that I love him.  Sierra and Joey are in Utah. I am so glad she is getting a break from my dad.  Living with him has been less than ideal.  Much, much less. This evening as she arrived in Utah he sent a not very nice text to her.  Unecccesary and particularly unkind.   I am mad.  So, so mad.  I don’t want to have anything to do with him at the moment.  Sierra needs to get out of his house as soon as she can. But she is trapped.  For now.  My dad has no idea of the hurt he causes.  If you tell him he laughs it off. He is difficult.  He loves us. It is especially hard when someone who loves you hurts you so deeply but doesn’t acknowlegde it.  My dad took a wrong turn in his life long ago.  When I was 7. He was packing to move out of our house and I wrote him a note asking him not to forget me.  I cried when I wrote it. I distinctly remember my tears falling on the paper.  I forgave him for leaving. I forgave him for not being there. I forgave him for raising someone else’s kids.  I forgave him for leaving me behind.  Our relationship was fairly good.  He has always had his issues but he has been there for me in the best way he knew how.   He said wanted Sierra to come and live with him.  He didn’t mean it. Or at least it seems like he didn’t.  Forgiveness will come for this latest transgression.  I just feel hurt so deeply.  I have been thinking about Christ today. How he felt all of our hurt in the garden of Gethsemane.  Only the Son of God could have bore such pain.  I imagine it lasted a long time.  One day when I see him again.  I will thank him for walking beside me during these times of sadness and pain.   

This is my grandmother.  My dads mom.  It was her birthday this past week.  She died when I was just 14.  How I wish I had been able to know her longer on this earth.  She had a wonderful laugh. She loved to read, she loved to cook and was amazing at it.  She was a talented seamstress and dancer.  I was one of the youngest cousins, only Ty was younger than me, Grandma let me be loud and play in her flour drawer as long as I washed my hands.  She pushed me on the tire swing out behind the porch leaving black marks on the house.  She loved me.  

I am looking forward to conference weekend.  I need to come and listen to a prophets voice.  To be comforted.  To feel the spirit.