Better

I am much better than my last post.  I ended up writing a letter to my dad that I will probably never send but it was very therapeutic to say all the things I was feeling and thinking.  The things I wanted him to know but feel like it would only hurt him to tell him.  

Anywho, we won’t dwell on that.  Last weekend was conference and prom and the International Ball.  The best part? Conference for sure!  :)  We all watched each session together with the exception of a couple of the first talks Saturday that Joe missed.  Haylee and I love taking notes and eating snacks.  There were so many good talks and no breaking news lol.  Soooo many rumors before conference and none of them came to fruition.  It’s fun to speculate on new revelation but also good to remember that the Lord is in charge of the timing and order of all things.  :) 

Saturday night was prom.  Haylee went by herself and met friends there.  That caused me a ton of anxiety. I was so worried about her walking in alone.  She was nervous but brave.  We got her hair done for the occasion.  It was fairy princess hair for sure!! 

Joe and I attended the International Ball that evening too so we were all dressed up together.  ❤️

We were in a hurry so the pictures were pretty rushed.  This dress fit Haylee perfectly.  She loved it. I love this girl. 

They did not want to take this picture.  I made them and I’m glad.  

Us


Keva and I getting diet cokes at the bar :) 

Me and Steph. 

My date. 

A fun group. 

The ball was great. Both anthems were sung and the Canadian artillery pipe band played the bag pipes.  It was amazing. 

My girl after she got home.  She had fun.  Not the best time ever but a good night. 


Some of my favorite conference quotes. 





Our official pic.  :) 

My friend and neighbor Amber is moving.  We went to a girls dinner to wish her well.  We wore pink since Amber battled and beat breast cancer last year. 

I also went to a big craft fair with a bunch of these gals.  I got that gather sign for my dining room.  :) 

Emotional

Tired.  Emotional.  And just sad. 

This is me tonight.  I have been feeling a bit melancholy this week.  Missing my family.  Thinking about things I will miss with our new little one. And yet knowing that he will never doubt for one minute that I love him.  Sierra and Joey are in Utah. I am so glad she is getting a break from my dad.  Living with him has been less than ideal.  Much, much less. This evening as she arrived in Utah he sent a not very nice text to her.  Unecccesary and particularly unkind.   I am mad.  So, so mad.  I don’t want to have anything to do with him at the moment.  Sierra needs to get out of his house as soon as she can. But she is trapped.  For now.  My dad has no idea of the hurt he causes.  If you tell him he laughs it off. He is difficult.  He loves us. It is especially hard when someone who loves you hurts you so deeply but doesn’t acknowlegde it.  My dad took a wrong turn in his life long ago.  When I was 7. He was packing to move out of our house and I wrote him a note asking him not to forget me.  I cried when I wrote it. I distinctly remember my tears falling on the paper.  I forgave him for leaving. I forgave him for not being there. I forgave him for raising someone else’s kids.  I forgave him for leaving me behind.  Our relationship was fairly good.  He has always had his issues but he has been there for me in the best way he knew how.   He said wanted Sierra to come and live with him.  He didn’t mean it. Or at least it seems like he didn’t.  Forgiveness will come for this latest transgression.  I just feel hurt so deeply.  I have been thinking about Christ today. How he felt all of our hurt in the garden of Gethsemane.  Only the Son of God could have bore such pain.  I imagine it lasted a long time.  One day when I see him again.  I will thank him for walking beside me during these times of sadness and pain.   

This is my grandmother.  My dads mom.  It was her birthday this past week.  She died when I was just 14.  How I wish I had been able to know her longer on this earth.  She had a wonderful laugh. She loved to read, she loved to cook and was amazing at it.  She was a talented seamstress and dancer.  I was one of the youngest cousins, only Ty was younger than me, Grandma let me be loud and play in her flour drawer as long as I washed my hands.  She pushed me on the tire swing out behind the porch leaving black marks on the house.  She loved me.  

I am looking forward to conference weekend.  I need to come and listen to a prophets voice.  To be comforted.  To feel the spirit.  

Two weeks

I have been meaning to blog and then they says just pass and I end up reading at night or watching reruns of Friends instead of blogging :)

The last two weeks have been:

Temple with Keva.  The changes are WONDERFUL!  I am so thankful for modern revelation. 

Jury duty summons for Missouri.  Hopefully the fact that I’m not a resident there anymore and the fact that the courthouse is 1906 miles round trip will get me excused :) 

Shocker of the month, year maybe is that I have been going to the gym.  I started one week ago and have been to four classes.  It would have been five but our Tuesday class got cancelled. I go to barre two days a week, we do some work at the barre but mostly floor work, some weights, squats.  I was sore all over after barre.  Monday’s and Wednesday’s we go to Swerk.  It is a hip hop dance class.  I could barely walk Tuesday!  Lol.  Wednesday I went again and worked out all the soreness.  Today was barre again.  I may go to a Saturday class from time to time.  We will see :) I am excited to have awesome friends to attend with.  I am motivated to keep going.  

The weather has been “warming up” last weekend it was 53 whitch is practically summer in North Dakota.  We BBQd and wen to the zoo!! 

We love the zoo here!! 

That night there was a gorgeous sunset. 

And we had our first neighborhood fire pit of the year. 

Love these great neighbors!  

Sunday morning I woke up broke out in hives.  I have make up on in the pic but it was my forehead, cheeks, neck and back of my hands.  So random. 

A couple days ago HD and Kass went to a Jazz game.  My sweet Emmett is getting so big!!!  Just over 8 weeks away!!! 

Brave

Haylee needs blood drawn.  Haylee does not do needles.  At all.  Ever.  When she needed a shot for school this year she passed out before a needle was near her.  She had barely stepped foot inside the clinic and down she went.  She had last Thursday and Friday off school.  We headed to the lab Thursday before lunch.  I was prepared to be there for a couple of hours because once her anxiety kicks in it is near impossible for her to do what she needs to do.  We walked in, gave the tech her ID at the desk and headed right back.  Imagine my surprise when Haylee walks in the lab without any coaxing or coaching or reassurance.  I advised the tech Haylee needed to be on a bed and not in a chair in case she passed out. That was my first mention of her anxiety. (I had prayed I would know what to say to the tech and to Haylee. I feel the tech needs to know she is scared so they don’t go too fast but I also think that it is worse when we talk about it.) Anywho, Haylee climbed on the bed and the tech got out the supplies.  I expected Haylee to freak out, she did not. The tech put the turnicate on. I expected Haylee to freak out, she did not.  The tech got the needle I was ready for Haylee to run away or kick the tech or freak out!!  She did NOT!  She took a deep breath and the tech stuck the needle in, I expected Haylee to punch her, she did not!!! Now for the sad news, the needle was in but no blood was coming out the tech moved the needle around.  That was BAD BAD BAD for Haylee and she started to freak out.  Saying “STOP! STOP!!!”  The tech was awesome and took the needle right out.  Then Haylee got very pale and said she was having some tunnel vision and feeling clammy- the tech laid her back and got her feet above her heart.  Then that sweet tech got her two ice packs and some water.  Once Haylee was feeling ok I posed the question could we try the other arm?  The tech came in, the tech went out, in and out over and over with several minutes in between.  Finally Haylee said “ok” the tech put the turnicate on but Haylee could not handle her picking up the needle.  Haylee felt so bad that she couldn’t try again.  I write all this to try to show the genuine fear that Haylee has.  I felt the day was a HUGE victory because we went in and she let them stick her!!!!!  When we left Haylee said “I  figured if we just went fast my mind wouldn’t freak out as bad.”  And it didn’t!  It worked!  Hopefully we will try again next week.  I was so proud of her.  After that we went to Olive Garden to celebrate.  Anytime we go on the weekends the wait is 45 minutes or longer.  It was so nice to get there and be seated right away!  :) 

Friday we rescued our friends. They were headed to the lake to snowshoe.  They were on a road that was drifted over.  The drift didn’t look deep until they were in it and they didn’t have a shovel.  

Joe and Brent worked really hard at shoveling. Steph worked a little and I was mostly on hand for cheering and looking fab. It took over an hour to dig them out!  

Me and Steph. 

Steph getting ready to go under the truck. 

The snow was so hard on top that if you didn’t sink about 18 inches it broke like this.  It was cool! 

That night we met old friends for dinner.  

Saturday was our Chief’s get together. 

When I got there someone said “you and Monica are dressed alike”. It got even funnier when I realized our hubbies were twinning too!! 

The hubs. 

Me and Lisa and Laura.  Two of my faves! 

Us with the Weiners. 

The guys.  I have a girl one somewhere. 


Sunday was church, Monday Joe woke up with his eye looking like this.  Thankfully a guy in our ward is the base optometrist. I texted him and he told Joe just to walk in his office and he would see him between regular patients.  :) He also evaluated him right then through pictures and us answering questions about Joe’s symptoms.  I was worried because it’s the left side of his face which is where his titanium plates are from his accident. Good news, his blood vessels are just freaking out.  Steroid drops, artificial tears and an appt for a week from now if it isn’t better.  It looks tons better today!! 

Tonight Haylee passed level five!!!  She was so happy.  She loves ice skating. 

This was the sunset at 8:05, I saw it after dashing to the library to print a couple of things for Haylee J.  

We live in a beautiful world!  And I am extra glad we aren’t getting snow from the massive storm over Colorado,  South Dakota and even most of North Dakota.  :) I’ll take the meltdown that is happening with the warmer temps!    

Last weekend

Last weekend we went to the Chief Recognition Ceremony.  It is to recognize the people who made Chief the last cycle.  (The cycle happens annually) :) there were only four at our base.  One of them was my good friend Amber who battled breast cancer this last year.  She is an amazing lady!!  So fun to be able to celebrate with her.  

New dress!!  It had pockets and I LOVED IT!  Got tons of compliments.  :) 

My friend Laura, I met her two years ago at the Chief orientation we attended at Barksdale AFB, LA

Joe is on the right third guy down. This is the saber team that the chiefs and their escorts walk through as they are announced. 

Us.

CMSAF ret. Rod J. McKinley 

Joe standing for the Chief’s oath.  

Me and Amber and her hubby Lee.  He is a Chief too! 

All the Chief’s at Minot. 

Joe wanted to be fancy.  

Keva, Laura, Stephanie and me 

All the Chief Spouses that attended. 

I didn’t wear a coat. Joe said he would pick me up at the door.  When we were leaving he said it “wasn’t bad out”. I almost froze to death.  Actually froze!  Lol.  I think I earned a new badge of honor. 


The next day I did my hair a little differently.  I told Joe we should take a pic.  This is how he posed for me.  Goof. 

Just me. My hair is getting long. 

Haylee was in the play The Hobbit.  She had a teeny, tiny part and mostly hated the rehearsals.  In the end it turned out great and she was sad it was over. 

Haylee as part of the Elven Guard

She looked so pretty! 

She is the front goblin in the lower pic. Their masks were great! 

Bows. 

Pretty ND skies. 




And last but not least this sweet baby boy!!  He deserves his own post for sure but I am tacking him on at the end just he case he doesn’t get it this go round.  Lol.  This is our sweet baby Emmett.  (That’s his name unless divine revelation tells them otherwise)  it is amazing what you can see in a sonogram.  This is his 3D photo.  No matter what they did he would not uncover his face!  He is going to be a pro at peek-a-boo.  Oh how his Mimi can’t wait to hold him.  I think he looks like Kass in this picture even though you can only really see his mouth.  :) 

Cutest profile EVER.  Can’t wait to kiss those sweet cheeks.  Just over 11 weeks to go!!! Yay!!